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200 Contest Winner

Congratulations, Jim Steinberg!

(Illinois, USA)
As I lay dying, what final words come out? I spent hours visualizing myself being maimed and decapitated. Few scenarios allow exactly 200 words as you die.
Say I’m in ropes on a train track.
On the spot, I’d probably…weep, pray to Buddha, and utter 196 words of hysterical screaming.

No, my words need to be perfect, maybe even quotable!

Plan.

Part 1:

Pick Judgment Day in the near future,

Do everything I ever dreamed of doing.

Then everything I never dreamed of doing.

Why things I never dreamed of?

A year without Honor Roll was more memorable than a thirty-something ACT score.

Because I learned perfection doesn’t matter to my parents.

Or to me.

Staying home on Homecoming was more memorable than prom.

Because I learned fun is found with friends, not events.

Dancing should only be done on a DDR machine.

Part 2:

Write a 200-word letter so my final words are perfect.

Carry it everyday until that train comes.

Dear Mortician,

Make sure I’m dead.

I decided not to simply quote a famous poet. My life was not lived to remind you of some dead guy.

On second thought…live by Oscar Wilde’s final words.

P.S. Pinch Me.

Next>>

November 17 2008 01:23 am | Uncategorized

154 Responses to “200 Contest Winner”

  1. Akshay Says:

    Hahaha, “Dear Mortician, make sure I’m dead”

    You deserve to be the 200 Word! Winner!!!! This is AWESOME!

  2. James Says:

    oh my!, well thank you
    But I’m serious about living by Oscar Wilde’s final words

  3. guess who Says:

    haha, Oscar Wilde is pretty fantastic, he’s got to be one of my fave authors.

    If i remember correctly, his final words were: either the wallpaper goes, or i do.

    England always knew how to make their last words their most impressionable.

    my 200 was no where near as funny or fantastic as yours, but i guess we can’t all be as amazing as mr.steinberg

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