Thin Ice

winter
has come
silting the streets white and pure
covering the dust and grime of what’s come before
in blankness.

the cold
it deadens. penetrates. yeah, that’s the word.
nothing more to say. you know. or you don’t.
with words you can revisit memories
not create them.

you’ve either known the cold. or no.

I stand
white fog issuing slowly from my mouth. fading into the frigid air
like it never existed.
I stand
under the shadow of the empty sky.  grey and vast.
look at the almost-frozen pond
(where did the ducks go? to that big duck pond in the sky. who asks these questions? geez.)
the ice as thick as my finger, smooth as smooth
untouched. inviting.
I want…but that’s just crazy, I…
and yeah, I think of him.
the first time I skated on thin ice

I fell right through
what did I do wrong?
what was it about me that screwed things up?

Right through.
A splash.
A sudden scream.
Unheard.

that deathly burning cold. didn’t stop at your bones. went right through. right past…

thesearemetaphorsofcourse
you silly thing.
I’d never skate on thin ice.
imagine what could go wrong. imagine if I fell
imagine that crazy daring sliding on to the thin ice and moving fast fast faster racing to the end
adrenaline exhilaration that heady rush imagine being that way
of doing what I want acting on impulse instead of…

you see, it takes the sort of stupid courage I unlearned
taking that leap of faith not knowing the strength of the ground beneath you
telling someone those three fatal words
not knowing the strength of their feelings
not knowing if the ice beneath you will give way…

nothing more to say. you know. or you don’t.
nothing more to say. you know. or you don’t.
nothing more to say. you know. or you don’t.
do you know? do you?

winter
is here
silting the streets white and pure
the cold numbing the ache, making you , no, me, forget
covering the dust and grime of what has come before
in blankness.
and  thawing out a sudden reckless longing
to fly again across that length of ice
to that dark figure on the other side.
not caring for the

Consequence.
imagine that.

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